New state statistics reveal growing poverty, declining education, rise in inbreeding

Great, the Virginia Department of Commerce, Education and Safety statistics are out. They indicate that in per capita income Virginia has slipped to the 49th state in the nation, higher than only Alabama. Unemployment increased 4%, foreclosures increased 3.1%, and the high school graduation rate dropped to 42%.

I really want to get out of Virginia since it's filled with elitist Yankees in the North, degenrate rednecks in the South and a bunch of negros and Mesicans in the center. This state has gone to hell. Let me out.

What city should I move to? Your advice is appreciated.

- Austin